Here I sit, the day is done,
my feet are on the desk.
I'm thinking of the day gone by
and how I did my best.
What will I do, I ask myself,
to finish up the day?
Will I go home, or to the store,
or go soak up some rays?
Here comes a salesman walking to
my desk with pen in hand...
"Help me write an ad", he says.
"This one I HAVE to land."
"Please make the list'ners stop
and pay attention when they hear it.
This guy has lots of bucks to spend,
so call and let him hear it."
"Everything is marked way down,
be sure to give the prices.
Name them all please, one by one.
Tell them it's a crisis."
"It's got to be the greatest ad
that ever has been done...
Of any sale that's been before
Thisn's number one."
"Mention that he's new in town
and why they all should go there...
Tell them all the brands he sells.
Selection is matched NOWHERE."
"Put in there that what they buy
can be paid for on time...
And for the first year and a half
you won't pay a dime."
"Be witty, cute and comical...
be serious but funny.
Tell them anything you can
to make them spend their money."
"Use sound effects and clever words.
Don't miss a single trick.
Tell them if they want this stuff
they'll have to get there quick."
"The address is important
plus his other stores to serve you.
The phone number should be said twice?
Is this all clear to you?"
Oh yes, I said, just leave it here
until I find some time.
"Oh no, he wanted it today
and I said that was fine."
So here I sit, working on
the best ad ever heard,
with everything about his store
not leaving out a word.
The entire history of his store
is all right here I reckon...
And all I have to do is
make it fit in thirty seconds.
Kelly Klaas
KEZJ, Twin Falls, ID
♦