This is a piece of work done by Al Peterson, Production Director at WLAD/98Q in Danbury, CT nearly 30 years ago. This audio was featured on the January 1992 RAP Cassette and came with the following story you must read first before listening: -----

"Here is the cut that has driven strong men into the night in tears: FLOWER GIRL!!! If you didn't read about it the first time in Radio World [March 27, 1991], here's the outline:

Nicky Stevenson (old and drunk) came 'round the station some months back with a cassette of his "songs" for us to play on the air. His music consisted of him blathering into a Yorx cassette machine -- no music, no drum tracks, nada. Just a few memorable titles like, "Oh Lisa," "I'm a Good Shoe," and "Snowball Baby" shouted onto tape with 86-proof inspiration.

All it took was one guy here saying, "Gee, that would be pretty funny if it were set to music." Well, that was a challenge too good to pass up, so I took Nicky's cassette home over vacation, extracted a few "useable" lines to figure out the key and tempo, and spent two days putting music together. Basically, it was the equivalent of a jigsaw puzzle completely painted white -- thoroughly impossible but fun trying.

Especially memorable was the modulation from E/flat to D (made possible by a hellish combination of chords resembling a freight train wreck).

The reel has a few seconds of Nicky on his own from the cassette he gave me. After that, "Flower Girl" in all its stereophonic splendor. If his voice sounds different in the finished work, it was drowned in Alesis reverb and goosed with a touch of Aphex -- anything to kill the hiss.

If you've ever heard of someone trying to save a piece of audio "in the mix," you'll love "Flower Girl." It's so horrible, it's hysterical.

PS -- The high pitch heard on the quiet passages is clock noise from a cheap Yamaha synth -- couldn't get it out."

Here's a spot that's been getting a lot of plays from the archives over the past couple of weeks. This spot came in as a Finalist in the 1992 Radio And Production Awards. Submitted by Sean Lowman at KZJH in Jackson, WY, this spot is very cleverly done -- a great way to push a product without boring the listener. Can be applied to countless products, including your station.

This spoof spot from the archives has been getting some extra plays this month. Written, voiced and produced by Jon Lockwood back in 1995 while at WCRZ/WWBN/WFNT in Flint, MI, as featured on the January 1995 RAP Cassette. Enjoy!

Let's see. I've counted 10 submissions from one of my "make client reads easier to listen to" campaigns. I've got more and by now you could very well be tired of 'em. But the point, as was hammered home by an established marketing pro I worked with a while back, is pretty plain. "Good campaigns have LONG legs". That comes with working at keeping the scenarios fresh combined with a client who's wiling to roll with it because they've been presented with the possibilities of this kind of approach. (of course a lot of 'em are not. And that's OK. But you'd be surprised at the number who ARE willing to roll the dice) If they seem to break the "radio correctness" of a locally produced ad, consider this. I heard a Geico radio commercial that personalized "dust bunnies". Silly? Absolutely! But many radio station dudes are more than creative enough to come with something as "out of the box" as that. Big agencies DON'T have exclusive dibs on creativity. The different sales points/events from ad to ad already lend some variety. Keeping the campaign a tad unpredictable, yet consistent, remains in the hands of the copywriter and producer to deliver the goods to show they're working for a client who might be already hesitant to put down hard earned money for radio ad campaigns. (A pain in the butt sometimes, considering the other deadlines we're up against) And the account rep who continues to call on those clients usually bares the brunt of this reluctance. Yet, that client resistance may begin to thaw if they hear customers tell 'em they dig your station's ads when shopping at their place of business. This attached commercial was inspired by a simple utilization of theater of the mind. Nothing earth shatteringly humorous. But still working to transform that "client has to be distant" perception into one that makes them human--and relatable. (not to mention fed up with his dopey announcer)

There are a few benefits about a client voice-based radio campaign where you coach the client's voice parts to a point they can EXACTLY repeat the lines you feed them. Of course, if you've been consistent with the irreverent tenor of the campaign, the client will start trusting you more as they hear how the big picture unfolds and begin to loosen up. And THIS makes it even EASIER to direct them moving forward. So then you can occasionally put them in far fetched situations previously reserved for the more talented voice actors on your staff. Putting the client in these kinds of scenarios from time to time not only keeps the legs of your campaign growing even longer, but it presents the client in even more of a fun light that listeners (and potential customers) might eventually find easier to gravitate towards...

Another option with this whole "making the client sound relatable" campaign I've been submitting has been to make said client the voice of reason in the midst of dealing with his dopey announcer. Nothing like bursting one's bubble to keep things from going totally off the rails...

Here's another episode in one of my "making the client sound relatable" campaign. It's interesting to turn a client into the voice of reason amidst the ramblings of an oblivious announcer. In other words--Seems safe to insist same series spots sound similarly silly in sequence--which is kinda the goal.

It's been my experience when a client voices their own ad, breaking it into short bursts interspersed with an announcer (in this campaign, one who's kind of a chowder head) tends to be more friendly to the ears of a casual listener. But occasionally it's good to let said client voice the whole thing. The caveat is making sure there's a fly in the ointment to keep the unpredictable campaign scenario going. In this sample I just had one voice part, which was minor. But, when you give the client palatable direction, they can pull it off and hopefully leave some members of the audience with a "sheepish" grin.

I know Memorial Day's just past. But special sales can still be a little irreverent when you've got a client voiced ad campaign featuring the same basic elements--the client, the same dopey pain-in-the-behind announcer--then sprinkle in lots of people's favorite Memorial Day activity--a cook out.

Sustaining long legs with a radio campaign can be a challenge. But I think it's what keeps an audience listening to hear the next episode of this "client dealing with an oblivious announcer" saga. So, what's say we combine TWO potential headaches for the client. Number one, an announcer who decides to wax poetic and, number two, the same announcer who STILL can't get the client's name right...

As we continue the continuing saga of making a client sound relatable as they contribute a voice to their radio ads, I find that the announcer getting the client's name wrong can be a hook that's got some legs to it and can be applied to numerous situations--even those that, if for just a fleeting moment, get the client's name right...

I know it's probably been done before, but I had to try it. "It" being the announcer getting a client's name wrong in the very ad they're voicing. This kind of playful deprecation, I think, not only helps listeners remember the client's name but also sheds a little light on said client as someone with a sense of humor. But since the sale info talked about things like family and holidays, I had to throw In a curve. So in this installment from one of my "making the client sound relatable" campaigns I added a female voice to the mix. Keeps the pressure off the client with short, punchy lines-yet continuing to play on the lack of trust the client has in the announcer's ability (or willingness) to get it right. Oh, did I mention this client only had the budget for 30's? Even more fun...

Client voiced radio ads can sure be a challenge. In a lot of cases you're giving a person who probably has little or no expertise interpreting broadcast copy a script to read. The result? They SOUND like someone with little or no expertise interpreting broadcast copy. In many cases you can avoid that. Case in point, this ad from a series I perpetrated from a successful campaign for a local mattress and furniture store. The client--by his OWN admission had NO talent to read a radio script. (and he was right) But I figured this guy deserved more than the predictable client read. So I set up two voice situations with him. That way, you can write them short lines and, like Chaplin used to direct, give it to them the way it should be read and have them repeat after you. The result, at least in this campaign, was a series where the client sounded like they had a likeable personality (which he DID--my job was to get it across in a radio ad). And the added bonus was that customers commented frequently about the ads when they shopped the store. That's the kind of feedback you want, I think. And it starts with the little extra effort of writing more than just a "client voiced script"

When the client has an idea in mind, sometimes it can really come together. This was a client written rap that I put together and voiced. Lots of fun and the client was amazed that we could pull it off.

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Classic song turned into a duet by Don Elliot back in the days of 2-tracks and razor blades! Story behind the edit here: https://www.rapmag.com/a/372-15/jun15/3678-elvis-and-linda-love-me-tender